Machu Picchu

The tour guide had finished. ´Right guys, you go exploring now´.

Sweet. I´m free! I can never absorb anything from tour guides. Their dulcet tones wash over me, lulling me into that non-absorbent state called Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Wandered around the main areas for a bit....nice....lots of empty brick buildings, amazing views...but somehow something is missing. Where´s the REAL Machu Picchu? I don´t want signs telling me where to go. Screw this.

Abandoning the signposts, I decide to follow lizards and butterflies instead. Seems as good a sign as any - they probably know where all the cool bits are.

I descend to the abandoned areas where no restoration has taken place...the mysterious areas where no tourist goes...and I find...the mythical....Area Where the Gardening Equipment is Stored.

Okay, well, at least it made me chuckle. We wander on, the lizards and I, with the butterflies dancing about in the distance. The ruins are properly ruined here. Down we go, down, down...and then...CAVES!

Ooo, caves. Cavey McCaversens. Right. In we go....eurgh....yeah. In we go. Come on feet. ´Nooooo´say my feet, ´it´s dark and damp and cramped and there might be snakes and spiders and ewwwwwww.´ To placate them, I start whistling loudly. To scare off snakes.

The echoey whistling somehow makes me feel like I´m in the middle of a horror movie, so I stop. This is not a horror movie. It is a Cave. I crawl in. It´s pretty much as my feet imagined. Somehow I´m quite relieved when it becomes too dark to see and I have to turn back...not much point getting lost in the dark, I figure. It´s not likely I´ll be found any time soon if I do.

I start climbing back up to the touristy ruins. Predictably, there are a tour group and a tour guide. ´And the caves down there, where that girl is...´ the tour guide looks at me a little uncertainly, ´...an archeological dig in 2003 uncovered two very well preserved corpses...´

Whoo. I´m Lara Croft, 6 years too late.

This time.